Being spiteful or resentful is normal after ending a love relationship, especially if it ended badly and you felt very hurt. Feelings vary and a way is sought to quickly overcome this bond that has already ended.
The ways in which it can be done are varied. Some choose to stay alone for a while and others to interact with other people. For this reason, the famous dating site Ashley Madison revealed that having relationships with others can reduce the pain of spite. In a survey conducted on the platform, they found that 68% of women who use the app feel no compunction about having casual sex to feel better.
The website notes that meeting others and becoming sexually interested in more humans “would raise someone’s self-esteem, security, and confidence, which are key factors in feeling better and recovering from heartbreak.”
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In this sense, the experts point out that looking for a sexual encounter to relieve the cough or get the other out of mind is not going to be so simple. This will depend on the emotional stability of each person and how much the mourning of the previous relationship has healed.
“The important thing is why I want casual sex. It’s not that it’s bad. All people have needs, it is something totally human. But if you are going through a duel, if you are bad with yourself or if things happen in your life that you are channeling through sexuality, I would recommend taking a few minutes to identify if you want sex or if you are not. seeing other things that are happening in his life”, says psychosexologist Pierina Vergara.
On the other hand, the psychosexologist Norma Bejarano commented that it is also necessary to analyze how the previous partner ended, that is, if it ended due to infidelity or disagreements.
“Women if they seek sex it is more for revenge than infidelity. Men seek more sex because they want company and pampering. In reality, they are very sore when they end a relationship and they can’t stand being alone for a long time, that’s why they look for a partner instantly,” says specialist Bejarano.
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Likewise, the professionals warned that this method could further harm a broken heart and could even get excited about this new bond and be doubly spiteful.
“Casual sex can turn into a longer relationship if you like. There are people who know that only two or maximum three. There are articles that say that if you don’t want to fall in love with someone, don’t ‘fuck’ them more than three times. If you haven’t resolved your mourning, it will be more painful, because you may get hooked on the person who offered you a new physical contact,” says psychosexologist Norma.
Another thing that must be taken into account before starting a casual sex bond is what the person with whom you are going to have this encounter feels.
“Not all people are in the same process as one. One can be the most emotionally responsible and have things clear, but that does not mean that you find a person as responsible as you. To have casual sex you have to be empathic and know what the other person wants”, indicates Vergara.
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Finally, Norma Bejarano recommends that before resorting to casual sex it is better to give yourself some time alone and to resolve the situation that happened, since casual sex is only beautiful if “one does not have complexes, does not have traumas, or conflict situations ”.
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